IT’S ALL RELATIVE WHEN SHARING YOUR FAITH

“Do to others as you would like them to do to you.” – Luke 6:31.

It is not uncommon for a relative or family member to have a distaste for Christianity. You mention your faith, and your family changes the subject immediately. You credit God for doing something good in your life, and there’s an awkward silence. Some act annoyed or even offended when you invite them to a church service or a Bible study. The hard truth is that somebody needs to share the gospel with them, and family members can often be in the best position to do so. But yes, it can be intimidating because our families know our past, faults, and struggles. They know “what we’re really like.” While it may seem awkward, there are ways to talk about Christ with those we love that are possible and practical.

One thing to consider when sharing your faith with relatives is the golden rule. In other words, when talking with your family members about spiritual issues and the gospel, treat them the way you want to be treated. Don’t be confrontational or engage them in a group setting. Rather, have any spiritual conversation one-on-one. Ask the Lord to show you if there is anything that you need to address with your family members prior to sharing the gospel or talking about spiritual issues. Maybe it is an argument you had with the person or some unresolved issue that has built a wall between you.

Don’t be the person who goes on and on about a subject without listening to what others say, even when talking about spiritual issues. Too often, we don’t listen to the other person because we are too focused on formulating what we will say.

It is also important to let them know your true motive. The last thing we want to do is come across as pushy or preachy, self-righteous or that they are morally lacking. We want to be humble, helpful, and respectful. In other words, we want them to know your motive is that you want to share with them the most important aspect of your life, your relationship with the Lord.

From a practical standpoint, we need to be prepared for the long haul when sharing the gospel with family members. Sometimes, we think evangelical success means sharing the gospel and sealing the deal in one step. That may not happen. Remember, sharing Christ with relatives is more often a marathon than a sprint. Focus on moving them at least one step closer to Christ with each encounter.

If we don’t succeed after several tries, we may be tempted to consider a relative a “lost cause.” But don’t give up. Continue to pray for individuals because you never know God’s timetable and your role in that timetable.

Our responses matter, but only Jesus saves people. Mark 4 talks about planting seeds. We know how to plant seeds. But we do not understand how the plants grow. We do not tell the plants what they must do. But each plant grows by itself. And it continues to grow until the new seeds are ready. It is God who causes the seeds to grow. So we may sow the seeds. But God did the most important work. The seed is like God’s message. People must tell God’s message to other people. But only God can save someone. Only God can change a person’s life. These things are God’s work.

Discussion Questions:

  1. How can you listen actively and understand your family member’s perspectives before sharing your faith? 
  2. How do you avoid being judgmental or condescending when discussing your faith with your family? 
  3. How can you use shared experiences or life situations as a springboard to discuss spiritual matters with family? 

TREASURING JESUS

“And if we ask how are we to know where our hearts are, the answer is just as simple – everything which hinders us from loving God above all things and acts as a barrier between ourselves and our obedience to Jesus is our treasure, and the place where our heart is.” ― Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship.

One of the things we must choose in life is what we will treasure most. No matter how much or little we have, we have a treasure. Something or someone will be more important than anything or anyone else in our lives. Whatever that one thing or one person is – that is your treasure. For believers, our treasure is Jesus.

When we hear the phrase “treasure Jesus,” our minds begin listing everything we need to do to make our hearts treasure Him because “treasure” implies action. Or maybe you hear the phrase “treasure Jesus” and wonder what that even feels like or how you get back to treasuring Him above all else.

To treasure means to “hold or to keep as precious.”  The point is, do we regard Christ as precious? Is He our cornerstone, our all in all? God chose Jesus as the cornerstone to be the foundation of all things. He is the only One who we can trust in. He is the only One we can lean on. As Christians, we have experienced Christ in a way that inspires us to be transformed. We have seen Him in all His beauty. We have fully realized the depths of His mercy and how much He loves us. But do we see Him as precious in a way that reinvigorates our faith and seeks to glorify Him in all we do?

That sounds like we are treading in deep theological waters. But the challenge does not have to be complicated. Find the time to be with Jesus. Refresh your heart and mind to see how precious He is. Whether in prayer, worship, the Word, finding quiet time, or some other way, find time to treasure Him as He treasures you.  If you think about it, our whole life responds to God’s pursuit of us. God is the initiator, and He only really ever asks us to respond to Him. He pursues, and His people respond. God’s people have been responding to Him for hundreds of years, and our goal is to respond to Him by treasuring Him.   

One of the ways to treasure Him is to be a witness to others. Perhaps one of the greatest ways to witness is through treasuring Jesus by reflecting His love. After all, “God is love” (1 John 4:8), so when we show love to others, we show them God.  Jesus taught His disciples, “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples” (John 13:35).  Displaying genuine love for others makes you an effective witness and that you treasure God.

John Piper said, “Life is wasted if we do not grasp the glory of the cross, cherish it for the treasure that it is, and cleave to it as the highest price of every pleasure and the deepest comfort in every pain. What was once foolish to us—a crucified God—must become our wisdom, power, and only boast in this world.”

Discussion Questions:

  1. I want Christ to be the treasure of my life. Is that enough?
  2. How is what you treasure reveal about what your heart is pursuing? 
  3. What are some practical ways to treasure God?

HAS GOD FORGOTTEN ME?

“Yet Jerusalem says, “The LORD has deserted us; the Lord has forgotten us.“Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you! See, I have written your name on the palms of my hands…” – Isaiah 49:14-16.    

Scripture outlines the amazing things God promises to do for us. God promises to be abundant in loving kindness, to keep us from harm, and to never stop loving us.

But if that’s true, what about those times when everything is going wrong, when everything is moving from bad to worse, and when we can’t see anything good coming to us? At times like that, it’s easy to think God has forgotten us. So what’s going on at those times?  Has God forgotten us?  And if He has not forgotten us – then what is He doing?

Most of the book of Isaiah was written to address a crisis. Israel and Judah believed that God was the creator of the universe and had chosen them for an eternal covenant. But Assyria destroyed and exiled Israel, Babylon destroyed and exiled Judah, and Nebuchadnezzar destroyed the walls of Jerusalem and the Temple.  It might seem like God had abandoned Israel. This is why we read in Isaiah 49:14:” Yet Jerusalem says, “The LORD has deserted us; the Lord has forgotten us.” You can understand why they felt that way. They were supposed to be God’s people. “For you are a holy people, who belong to the Lord your God. Of all the people on earth, the Lord your God has chosen you to be his own special treasure” (Deuteronomy 7:6). Yet it did look like God had turned His back on them. They are probably thinking something like, “It all sounds good, but look at the realities of my life. All of God’s promises seem abstract and remote because my life is not going that well.”

We probably feel the same way at times. We are struggling with unemployment or health issues or a wayward child, while our neighbors have work, health, and responsible children. We think that God is remembering those people while He has forgotten about us.  But that’s not the case. He is remembering them, but He is also remembering you.  He is here, focused on you with compassion, love, and care.

And today, if you’re wondering where God is, remind yourself of this simple truth: God has not forgotten you. He will not forget. You will never be out of His sight or His mind. Let’s not be like Israel and look at the trouble, but let’s look up at the One who sits on the throne, the one who loves us and wants the best for us.

 Discussion Questions:

  1. How do you react in these moments when God seems distant?
  2. How can we be reminded that God will never forget us? 

FINDING JESUS EVERYDAY

“As they approached, Jesus said, “Now here is a genuine son of Israel—a man of complete integrity.”“How do you know about me?” Nathanael asked. Jesus replied, “I could see you under the fig tree before Philip found you.” Then Nathanael exclaimed, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God—the King of Israel!” – John 1:47-49.   

We try to go to church on Sunday or say a few prayers throughout the week. If we’re honest, these moments can often feel like a momentary deviation from “business as usual,” with life quickly returning to “normal” once the prayers or worship service has concluded. Are we missing the fact that God intends for our life of faith to be far more integrated and interwoven than we commonly think?

There are plenty of activities in our lives that, on the surface, seem to have nothing to do with our lives with God. The morning jog, filling a prescription, studying for that exam, and eating dinner just doesn’t feel to us like “spiritual” events. They seem separate from our spiritual life.  When faith lives on the margins of your life, it is easy to ignore, dismiss, and forget that God is there,  not just in the fringes but in every moment of every day. As Paul says in 1 Corinthians, “When all things are subjected to him, then the Son himself will also be subjected to him who put all things in subjection under him, that God may be all in all” (1 Corinthians 15:28 ESV).

It is easy to overlook the extraordinary ways Jesus seeks to engage with us. As Nathanael discovered in John 1:43-51, our most commonplace moments can become the backdrop for divine encounters. Nathanael, skeptical at first about Jesus of Nazareth, soon found himself face-to-face with the reality that Jesus was the Son of God.  This discovery did not come in some divine miracle or amid some grand temple but under a fig tree.

Nathanael’s initial doubt, “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?” (John 1:46), mirrors his preconceptions and biases. Yet, this story is another reminder that God often works outside our expectations, inviting us to discover Him in the unexpected and everyday places of our lives. “Philip went to look for Nathanael and told him, “We have found the very person Moses and the prophets wrote about! His name is Jesus, the son of Joseph from Nazareth….“Come and see for yourself,” Philip replied….Jesus replied, “I could see you under the fig tree before Philip found you ” (John 1:45-48).

The invitation from Philip, “Come and see,” is extended to us daily, urging us to look beyond our presuppositions and be open to encountering Jesus in new and surprising ways.

As you go about your day, remember that each moment holds the potential for a divine encounter. Whether you’re at work, at home, or in transit, Jesus is present and actively seeking a relationship with you. Seek Jesus with an open heart and mind, ready to be amazed by where and how He reveals Himself to you.

 Discussion Questions:

  1. Where are the “fig tree” moments in your life? Reflect on the ordinary, everyday places and situations where you might be overlooking the presence of Jesus. How can you become more attuned to His presence in these moments?
  2. Consider how your expectations might limit your encounters with Jesus. What steps can you take to open your heart to experiencing Jesus beyond these preconceptions?

SHOULD WE LEAVE CHRISTIANITY TO THE EXPERTS?

“Observe people who are good at their work—skilled workers are always in demand and admired; they don’t take a backseat to anyone.” – Proverbs 22:29 (MSG).

If you asked the average Christian about making disciples, they would view that task as being professionalized to the point that it should be passed off to the “experts.” The experts are seen as pastors, elders, etc., and making disciples is what we pay them for.

All the rest of us “don’t know where to begin or what to do, don’t know the Bible well enough, or are afraid someone will answer a question that we can’t answer,” so we leave it to the experts. The truth is we all play a role in discipling others. We have a responsibility to grow in grace, knowledge, and understanding. And the more we know, the more we should want to learn. The bottom line is that our spiritual growth has both inward and outward dimensions. We grow in the faith for our own sake and for the sake of others.

Before Jesus ascended, he explained the mission that awaited His followers after He returned to His heavenly Father. “Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you…” (Matthew 28:19-20).

Jesus says, “Go and make disciples.” Although this may seem to involve two separate actions—going and making disciples—it suggests the idea of “making disciples as you go along.” The assumption is that Jesus’ followers will often be “on the go,” in other words, actively doing something. That actively doing something means being engaged in some form of discipleship.

Every one of us is influenced by someone, and every one of us has a significant influence over someone else. Making disciples does not mean just bringing others to a one-time “moment of decision.” It involves continued learning together, growing together, and increasingly understanding our knowledge of God and how best to serve Him.

The bottom line is this: Every follower of Jesus Christ should be a disciple. Discipleship is about going to the next level. It’s about really living the Christian life to its fullest, as Jesus meant for us to live it. It’s being a disciple and, in turn, going out and making disciples of others.

“When the church becomes an end in itself, it ends. When Sunday school, as great as it is, becomes an end in itself, it ends. When small groups ministry becomes an end in itself, it ends. When the worship service becomes an end in itself, it ends. What we need is for discipleship to become the goal, and then the process never ends. The process is fluid. It is moving. It is active. It is a living thing. It must continue to go on. Every disciple must make disciples.”― Robby Gallaty, Growing Up: How to Be a Disciple Who Makes Disciples,

Discussion Questions:

  1. What does discipleship mean to you? How do you define discipleship? 
  2. How can you disciple others? What are some ways you can disciple others, whether formally or informally?

THE BEAUTY OF BELONGING

“Aloneness can lead to loneliness. God’s preventative for loneliness is intimacy – meaningful, open, sharing relationships with one another. In Christ we have the capacity for the fulfilling sense of belonging which comes from intimate fellowship with God and with other believers.” – Neil T. Anderson.

At some level or another, we all want to “belong” to something bigger than ourselves. We crave relationships and feeling connected to other people in some significant way—so much so that our desire to find connectedness and belonging impacts just about everything we do, whether we are believers or non-believers.

As a believer, you want to belong, and we want other people to belong as well. As a church, we want to create a culture of belonging rather than fitting in and believing that you are part of a group, family system, team, workplace, etc. Being a part of something brings value to a person. The desire to belong is deeply rooted in all of us.

To create a culture of belonging we need to stop seeing church or ministry as a group of friends hanging out. Instead, we need to see church and ministry as a group of Jesus followers called to minister to the needs of others. When we see ourselves as Jesus followers called to minister, we no longer enter the church space for ourselves but for others. The result is we no longer worry about people being different or seemingly mismatched because we see everyone as a person whose spiritual development has been entrusted to us. Maya Angelou said, “I long, as does every human being, to be at home wherever I find myself.”

This week, take a moment and consider whether you may be contributing to a “fitting in culture.”  Do you expect others to be like you? Do you avoid those who are different from you? Do you unintentionally create a box for people to “fit into,” or else they won’t be accepted? Ask God to help you be the type of person others can be themselves around and accept them despite their opinions, imperfections, or differences. Ask God to see them as people loved by God who we serve as best we can. This does not mean we will have a deep connection with everyone and anyone. It just means you will help create a place where people can have a sense of belonging.

God sent His Son to redeem us and give us His love and a place to belong. He gave us His church and told us, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.” And that is what the early church did. They shocked the ancient world with a love they never knew before. It was a love from God and a love from the community of believers. It was a sacrificial love, a caring love, a belonging love. Jesus has called us to do the same.

Today, people all around us want to be loved and belong. Why not introduce them to the love of God and His family?

Discussion Questions:

  1. If God created us with the need to belong, should the church be the safest place on earth to do that? What can we do as individuals to create a sense of belonging?
  2. Who can we invite to a church that clearly needs to belong?

WE MAY BE LONELY, BUT WE ARE NOT ALONE

“Reproaches have broken my heart, so that I am in despair. I looked for pity, but there was none, and for comforters, but I found none.”  – Psalm 69:20 (ESV).

There was once an advertisement in a newspaper that read: “I will listen to you talk for 30 minutes without comment for five dollars.” It sounds fishy, but in a few hours, that ad generated 10 to 20 calls. The pain of loneliness for some is so sharp that they are willing to try anything for half an hour of companionship.

The scourge of loneliness hits all of us at some point in our lives. It can last from a moment to a lifetime. There is the loneliness of college: away in a new place without any friends. There is also the loneliness of moving to a new city and not really knowing anyone. There is the loneliness of losing a job.

Loneliness is not a new concept. Psalm 25:26 (ESV)  says, “Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.” And Paul, writing from jail, in 2 Timothy 4:16 (ESV) says , “At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me.” And lest we ever forget, everyone had deserted Him when Jesus was on the cross. He cried out, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” Jesus knew what it was to be entirely without another by His side.

But what about us today? It is hard to be lonely when you have a relationship with God. When it seems like there is no one to reach out to, there is always the Lord. Psalm 27:10 (ESV) says, “For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the LORD will take me in.” God will never leave you nor forsake you. While people come and go, He is always there. Rick Warren said, “Because God is with you all the time, no place is any closer to God than the place where you are right now.”

But we must also invest in deep, meaningful relationships with other believers. As followers of Jesus Christ, we need real fellowship with other believers. We need the kind of fellowship that cannot take place in a worship service on Sunday morning, but rather the kind that happens by living life alongside one another and sharing joys and burdens, sorrows and disappointments, and victories and defeats. We need a place to “plug in,” a place to serve and support others and to be served and supported by others. We need an inner circle, just like Jesus had. These trusted friends will allow us to be transparent with our sin struggles and will love us enough to be there yet still hold us accountable to the truth of God’s Word. This is a biblical community. Even without a theological argument, we know we are better when we do life together and participate in small groups.

Do you have this type of Christian fellowship in your life?  If not, you are missing a vital element in your relationship with God.

Discussion Questions:

  1. Sometimes, we are not paying attention, and lonely neighbors are in our blind spots. How do we identify someone in our blind spot?
  2. How can we make a significant impact on the life of a neighbor who is experiencing loneliness?

TRUSTING GOD IN TIMES OF TRANSITION

“My counsel for you is simple and straightforward: Just go ahead with what you’ve been given. You received Christ Jesus, the Master; now live him. You’re deeply rooted in him. You’re well constructed upon him. You know your way around the faith. Now do what you’ve been taught. School’s out; quit studying the subject and start living it! And let your living spill over into thanksgiving.” – Colossians 2:6-7 (MSG).    

 No matter what stage of life we are in, we will experience transitions and seasons. College students, for example, will experience significant changes, such as becoming more independent, adjusting to new academics and responsibilities, and preparing for the future. When people start a family, start a new job, or retire, they transition from one thing to another.

When faced with uncertainty, it is natural to feel fear or anxiety about taking big steps in life. Despite all of the changes and transitions we will face in life, one thing will remain the same — God’s love for us. Scripture explains that we are not alone in our feelings and that God is here to help us. He has a great plan for each of us as we walk through the path of life. He helps to guide our steps and feet to where we need to go. We should not lean on our own understanding. Instead, we should lean on God’s understanding and plan for us. We can trust in God through these changes we may experience and stand firm in our faith. “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand” (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.” Every season of life brings its challenges, blessings and opportunities. We can embrace these new transitions, trusting in God’s timing and purpose. We must be grateful for each season and change, as they allow us to trust in God. God is constantly at work in our lives. We can face change with hope and confidence by trusting that He is with us every season. Psalm 62:6 says,” He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.”

God is the rock and foundation of our lives, so we can navigate through the transitions in our lives because no matter what season we may be in or the season we’ll face in the future, God is here with us.

Transitions and times of uncertainty can remind us of our foundation, and that’s a good place to find ourselves. Sometimes, routine, the false sense of control, and familiarity can be where our security lies.

 Discussion Questions:

  1. Describe how you feel about seasons of change. Are you ok with the change? What is the hardest part of change, in your opinion? What is the best part of change?
  2. In what ways do you struggle spiritually during times of transition? Looking back on them, how have times of transition strengthened your faith?

EXCUSES, EXCUSES

“But they all began making excuses. One said, ‘I have just bought a field and must inspect it. Please excuse me.’ Another said, ‘I have just bought five pairs of oxen, and I want to try them out. Please excuse me.’ 20 Another said, ‘I just got married, so I can’t come.” – Luke 14 18-20   

Most of us are pretty good at making excuses. Usually, our excuses are to explain our actions, whether good or bad, or to persuade someone to our way of thinking. For example, you  know you were speeding but are trying to figure out some reason for letting you off the hook: “Oh, I thought the sign I 95 meant the speed limit…glad you didn’t catch me over on SR 210 earlier.” Or “my car must have some sort of recall, that is the only practical reason for my drastic acceleration and speeding.”

Jesus tells a parable about some people who gave some not-so-good excuses to get them off the hook from an invite to a feast. It is the parable of the Great Feast and it is found in Luke 14. Jesus went to the house of a prominent Pharisee on the Sabbath day. He was at a dinner party when He told this parable. He uses a story similar to the event He is at. Jesus said,“a certain man was preparing a great banquet and invited many guests.” At the time of the banquet, He sent His servant to tell those who had been invited, “Come, for everything is now ready.”

But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said, “I have just bought a field, and I must go. “Another said, “I have just bought five yoke of oxen, and I’m on my way to try them out. Please excuse me.” Still another said, “I just got married, so I can’t come.” The servant came back and reported this to his master. Then the owner of the house became angry and ordered his servant, “Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame.” But after that, there was still room.

An excuse is a seemingly polite way of rejecting someone. These guests didn’t want to come to the banquet. They were thinking of the things they wanted to do or get done and not thinking about the host who had gone to all the trouble of preparing the banquet for those he had invited.

We always like to think our situation is different. It’s not. It doesn’t matter how legitimate the excuse is; they help nothing and hold us back from everything. We like to think of our excuses as “valid reasons,” but the fact is they are still just excuses.

What areas of our lives are we using excuses in? God wants us to lead a small group, volunteer with a specific ministry, or share our testimony with our neighbors, but then fear creeps in. We get nervous, afraid, and start to make excuses. God wants us to trust in Him, have faith, and leave our excuses behind.

 Discussion Questions:

  1. What excuses do we make for not doing something we know we should be doing?
  2. How hard would it be to go a week without making any excuses? What is it  – hard or not hard?

DEALING WITH CRITICAL PEOPLE

“ Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” – Ephesians 4:31-32.

Most people are complimentary of Jesus even if they are not believers. They may not believe Jesus was the Messiah or the Son of God, but they believe He was an important person in history, a great teacher, and a prophet. But that is nothing new. Even when Jesus walked on the earth doing miraculous things, there were people who were critical and, in some cases, openly hostile to Him. Chief among these people are the scribes and pharisees.

In Mark 2, Jesus has forgiven the sins and healed a paralyzed man. The Pharisees react to this in anger, suggesting Jesus was blaspheming. “But some of the teachers of religious law who were sitting there thought to themselves,“What is he saying? This is blasphemy! Only God can forgive sins” (Mark 2:6-7). Verse 8 tells us Jesus knew what they were thinking, so He says, “Why do you question this in your hearts? Is it easier to say to the paralyzed man ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or ‘Stand up, pick up your mat, and walk’?

Jesus’ response is terrific. Is it more difficult to heal a paralyzed man or say, “Your sins have been forgiven you?” Then Jesus performed the more difficult task from a critic’s perspective – He healed the man. The message to the religious leaders was that Jesus had divine authority. He had authority that they did not have. They could not forgive sin, but Jesus could. The same is true today. Only God can forgive our sins.

Most people shy away from criticism. We naturally want to avoid tough conversations where our actions, motives, or ministries are put under another person’s microscope. At the same time, many people don’t like to share critique or criticism with others because they don’t want to come across as judgmental or risk hurting someone’s feelings.

How do you respond to criticism? Well, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you respond carefully. There is a difference between destructive and constructive criticism. As much as we dislike criticism, do we improve because of constructive criticism? Constructive criticism is an incredible asset. Proverbs 27:6 (NIV) says, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted….” Are we better people because people pointed out some things that made us better parents, students,  and leaders? We may miss growth opportunities if we don’t listen to constructive criticism. If we sit back and think about it, we can probably come up with examples where constructive criticism made a difference in our lives.

If you want to find something to be critical about, you can find it anywhere and everywhere. But if you want to look for good, if you want to see God working, if you want people growing, you can see it, and you become what you focus on.

When God allows my life to collide with a difficult person’s, it is an opportunity to act more like Jesus. In other words, difficult people are not meant to bring out the worst in us; they are meant to bring out the Jesus in us. It is an opportunity to display grace.

Discussion Questions:

  1. What are some of the reasons we reject criticism?
  2. How do we tell the difference between constructive and destructive criticism?
  3. Is there truth in this criticism from which we can learn?