Who Is Responsible For My Happiness?

“But Peter said, “Man, I do not know what you are talking about.” And immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. And Peter remembered the saying of the Lord, how he had said to him, “Before the rooster crows today, you will deny me three times.” And he went out and wept bitterly.” — Luke 22:60-62. .

It’s great when people believe in us, cheer us on, make us feel valued and needed. We love when our spouse compliments us, a friend is there to give encouragement, a coworker stays late to help us on a project. The problem is when we become addicted to compliments, encouragement, them cheering you on; now, you rely on them to keep you feeling good about yourself, to feel validated. If you rely on people, you’ll be disappointed; people will let you down, get busy, not be there when you need them. Sometimes, people will even turn on you. 

Peter was one of the first followers of Jesus Christ. He was an outspoken and ardent disciple, one of Jesus’ closest friends, an apostle, and a “pillar” of the church (Galatians 2:9). Peter was enthusiastic, strong-willed, impulsive, and, at times, brash. But when Jesus needed Peter the most, when he was about to be crucified, Peter denied that he even knew Christ three times. So many times marriages reach their breaking point because one spouse depends on the other spouse for their happiness. Their whole world including their happiness rises and falls on the actions of the spouse. The solution is to quit depending on your spouse or someone else to make you happy. Only God can truly make you happy. 

No other person can create real and lasting happiness for you. Nor are there any formulas or how-to directions. True happiness that does not depend on what others do. God alone is the only source of all happiness and contentment.  Paul said, “And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19). Not your spouse, mentor, pastor, or your best friend – but God. Don’t miss understand me.  There is nothing wrong with sharing your concerns or problems with your pastor, or a professional counselor. But ultimately we need to take our needs to the Lord and allow Him to work in your life. Eventually, leaning completely on Jesus is the best thing you can do. God can heal all our hurts. He can heal any relationship. He can wipe away every tear and bring joy, but we simply do not take the time or effort to run to Him in bad times as well as good times.  

You can be happy. You don’t need others to make you happy. That is not to say we don’t need one another. We need the prayer, help and comfort of loving friends and family. But there can be no lasting happiness if we expect others to create it for us. Remember we have a Savior that is waiting for us to run to Him. “…And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:20) 

Discussion Questions: 

1. Do you believe that we rely too much on others for happiness? Why or why not? 
2.  What can we do this week to ensure that God is the source of our happiness?